One Cupcake

[stubbornskeptic]

[Jane tiptoes around the gate, eyeing it like it’s about to jump out and attack her. With all her ties to her various allies (and potential murderers) cut, she’s feeling a little off-kilter. Whether this is the thing that brought her here or the thing that will get her out, she doesn’t feel like jumping into it will have any bearing on her tight-assery. After all, it’d be just ludicrous to jump headfirst into it when she doesn't know what it does.

Unless her dad’s in there.

Oh shit, what if her dad’s in there?!

Jane grips her cheeks (the ones on her face, geez!), groaning a little. Whatever is she meant to do now?]

Comments

[stubbornskeptic]

Alright. So, uh, you've had quite a bit of alone time with Jake, huh?

[Oops, that came out kind of bitter and also not totally intentionally. She just kind of purses her lips now, annoyed at herself for letting that slip out.]

[splinterself]

And my alternate universe parents. [So awkward.] You know Roxy's mom is nothing like her.

[stubbornskeptic]

[Oh, good, Dirk didn't notice anything out of the ordinary.]

Really? I would have thought she'd be just as constantly sauced, especially with the books she churned out.

[splinterself]

[That's also something he's fucking not going to touch, at least not now, so yeah. Fuck yes safer topic.]

Nah. Reminded me a little bit of me, actually. Fucking uncanny.

[stubbornskeptic]

I suppose that would make sense, genetically speaking. Are you one big happy family yet or is there still some tension brewing in the Strider-Lalonde camp?

[splinterself]

What tension would there be? Shit's been awesome. [...uh huh.] It's basically been brofists all around. The tensest thing I've got going is some obligatory brotherly rivalry with birdbro, and even then it's a bet I'm not planning on losing. He thinks I'm gonna back down? Yeah, right, he's got another thing coming. [The bet being who's more heroic: Dave or Dirk. Dirk's money is on Dave, Dave's money on Dirk.]

[stubbornskeptic]

[Jane raises an eyebrow.]

Yes, that just sounds the picture of family harmony. Not an eye blinked out of sync, no sir!

[splinterself]

Is that disbelief I hear in your tone? I keep on telling you, you got to be more like English. You got to trust people when they say that everything's fucking awesome. [Uh huh. Also, there's no way this will backfire.

...

He's also pulling out his Relic at this point.]

[stubbornskeptic]

[Jane takes his cue and does the same.]

I suspect that sometimes you bring out that "be more like English" jab when you want to get your way, Mr. Strider. You might want to save up on that so I can be really gullible when you need it.

[She's teasing, of course.]

[splinterself]

You? [And at this point he's going to swap member addresses with her without asking, well, unless you're like, "Nooooooooooooo, never."] Trust me, that... [...and his lips quirk ever so slightly upward.] ...shalln't ever be a thing you ever got to worry about.

[stubbornskeptic]

[She sticks out her tongue at him.]

So, I haven't ventured out to fight anything yet. I suppose I'll always need a partner with the class I've been given. Not that I'm complaining, but it does make a girl feel a little weak in comparison to everyone around her!

[splinterself]

Yeah yeah. That's what we're here for. Jane, you're the leader of the group. You're the one who'll keep English and me alive while we hack away at... [There is a pause here. It's slight, pretty much the sort of thing really perceptive people or people who know him will would possibly pick up on.] ...goblins and other such fauna and in turn gain you valuable experience. We'll be the rungs you use to climb up on whatever the hell echeladder this game runs on.

[stubbornskeptic]

[Jane makes a face.]

Don't call me a leader! That's not me! I'm just your friend with the healing powers and the long whalloping stick! You of all people shouldn't be putting me on some sort of leader-pedestal.

[splinterself]

'Healer Leader' is the sort of thing I could work with when rapping. [Said utterly sincerely.]

[stubbornskeptic]

...You are an incredibly strange young man, Dirk.

[splinterself]

Yeah, I know. [Dude, it would make it so much easier for him to inventorize Jane's stuff if they had sylladexes, though. Just think about it. Just think about it.]

So, leader, has Lalonde arrived yet?

[stubbornskeptic]

[Jane huffs and shakes her head.]

I haven't seen her. Maybe her inebriation has caused her punctuality to take a decline. Heaven knows it took me forever and a day to get a hold of her, then again, it took Jake quite a while to get a hold of you too. Perhaps it is a Derse thing.

[splinterself]

Maybe. I'm sure she'll turn up at some point. [. . .

It should be noted that he's a guy who had some form of 'must track down Roxy and haul her tipsy ass out of the void' on his to-do list for years.]

Anybody give you the tour yet?

[stubbornskeptic]

Um, no, not exactly. I've just been wandering around, trying to get my bearings. It's strange, but I almost feel naked without all my Betty Crocker accessories. I guess I was more reliant on them than I realized.

[splinterself]

That shit messes with your head. You're better off without them.

Come on, I'll show you around. [And she can see highlights such as the city streets, the corner of hobodom, shops, and the docks, and all sorts of delightful things.]

[stubbornskeptic]

[She sighs.]

Oh, you're probably right.

[She follows him, trying her best to remember all of it.]

[splinterself]

[And they mosey towards the shops because sure, that's the least depressing option.]

My inventory got cleaned out too when I got here. They didn't leave a damn thing. Not even my collection of orange soda made it. It's like-...I won't start.

[stubbornskeptic]

[She doesn't say anything, but she senses he might be missing Cal most of all.]

Well, I guess this is the definition of a fresh start. We'll just have to make due.

[splinterself]

[Oh hell yes, he'll hug Jane and sob on her shoulder later about his missing wayward puppet and best friend. Except not really. But, to be serious for a moment, he'll probably allude to it at some point.]

Guess so. [Glances at her. Then back again. Then:] Pretty much a fresh start with everything. My brother's here to take his legacy back and I'm sure your suddenly younger old man...you know, I'm pretty damn sure Dave's younger than I am. [What the fuck.] But your old man will probably show the fuck up sooner or later. "Hey," he'll say, goofy grin and all, "Jane. Hope you weren't getting comfortable seeking the Zen of a pie to the face, the Tao of falling the fuck down. I'm here to take it back." And we'll be stuck making due with what we're left with: a ton of crappy level one equipment and Jake's legacy assuming his grandmother doesn't roll in next.

[stubbornskeptic]

...I think I'd like it if my younger dad were here, actually. He might see how silly it was to keep me grounded inside so often, hoo hoo.

Um. Even if he was absolutely right to.